Photo By Lindsey Autumn Photography
I just want to take a moment to talk about freedom.
Freedom: the quality or state of being free: as
a : the absence of necessity, coercion, or constraint in choice or action
c : the quality or state of being exempt or released usually from something onerous <freedom from care>
e : the quality of being frank, open, or outspoken <answered with freedom>
f : improper familiarity
g : boldness of conception or execution
h : unrestricted use <gave him the freedom of their home>
etc..
There is something so powerful and so attractive about freedom. When I see someone who is free in who they are, it gets my attention! Even if they are not free in the "right" things, it still gets noticed. Freedom commands attention. Have you ever felt free? Is there not something empowering and contagious about it? Doesn't everything within you just cry out for more. Do you not crave freedom? I do.
I love the feeling of being unconstrained. Doing and saying what I want with out the plastic-producing thoughts of "What will they say?" "What will they think?"
Something amazing happens in me when I decide to say, "WHO CARES!" I wipe off my painted on smile, and remove my lamp shade. Then, I boldly speak what is true to me! I cry when I am sad, I express anger, and love hard. The fire in me melts away the plastic shell I built for myself. I become vulnerable.
In this place I am ironically strengthened. I find that when I am living freely, I am more confident. I also feel more significant. I feel like people actually listen to what I have to say. I feel like they look at me and not past me. I notice the flaws I was so worried about showing are understood and easily forgiven. When I am living freely, I find growth. The struggles I may have carried for a long time slowly fall away. My burdens aren't as heavy and I can endure more.
I love freedom.
It is my favorite place to be! One of the reasons I created this blog, is freedom. I would even dare say, it is the reason. This is a place where I will always be free in myself. I will say what I want and post what I want without hesitation. This is me. For a long time, I would worry about how people viewed me. Not so much what they would think about the things I did/did not do, but who they thought I was. I would get so offended even to the point of cutting people off if they didn't "know" me. If they did not understand me, I would be so angry. I had an attitude like
"How dare you not know exactly who I am, even though I never show you my true self!"
I could not understand how you could misjudge the intentions of a person you are with all the time; someone you know. Which if the person was 100% with you all the time, that would be difficult to understand. But I was giving maybe 50%. I wasn't free and was too worried about someone thinking I'm this or that. I was too nervous that I'd step on toes or upset someone. The funny thing is I stepped on SO MANY toes and pissed so many people off with only 50%!
When you don't keep it real, you look two-faced!
People hate that! All we have to understand one another are our words and our actions. If your words and actions don't line up you will always be misunderstood. We love to cry about how we our so misunderstood, and how people just don't "get" us. Well if you say exactly what you mean, then they will. If we stop expecting others to live in our heads and actually use our mouths the speak what is true to us, we will be understood.
There's nothing more depressing than being a prisoner inside of yourself. At least for me, it has been one of the hardest things i've struggled through. Please don't misunderstand the message. I am not saying don't care about others. I am saying, do not let your fear of people's opinions dictate how you live. Live free of opinions. Live free of judgement. I'm telling you, it is so much easier to just be yourself and get corrected on a minor issue versus putting on a front and being corrected on a misunderstanding.
It is such an awesome feeling to be true to myself. It feels great to really live my life instead of going through life pretending. I love that I can say to you, this is me. I am free y'all and it is the best i've ever felt! I will not allow anyone (myself included) hold me back from living free with their opinions or judgements. This freedom tastes too good to let it go! I won't be selfish either, you can have some too. After all it's free. Go get it!
ClassiCourtxo
Post your insights, questions, and comments below!
I love that you wrote this piece! I often take so much random *ish for just being me...which can be a hot mess sometimes O_O. But I would rather be honest and happy over being miserable as a version of what someone else wants me to be.
ReplyDelete@asha I know what you mean girl, I've been there! You feel so much more confident even when dealing with difficult people, when you are being yourself.
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